Facing challenges after life of working

When Charles Aznavour wrote “Yesterday When I Was Young,” he touched on a theme that resonates with so many of us. I retired early last spring after a 40-plus year career on Wall Street, preceded by careers in television news and local NYC government, working for Mayor John Lindsay.

I soon learned that my newfound challenges, frustrations, disappointments and fears are not unique to me, but are happening to so many of us, as our lives suddenly take a 180-degree turn. It is not simply about age, tho I’ll address that in a later column, but a realization that suddenly nothing seems familiar (although it is really a gradual process). We start to eat differently; we deal with a whole new set of doctors and medications; our exercise regime shifts; shopping is different; our travel habits change; our relationships with friends and family evolve; and nothing seems the way it was throughout our working lives.

I have always worked. I grew up in Westchester County in a lower middle class family. My father died when I was only 12, and my mother worked full-time to support me and my younger sister.

As soon as I turned 16 and got my “working papers,” I took two buses summer days to work at Korvette’s department store, and when I was older I worked as a counselor at summer camps to help pay for college. I then worked my way through college in the cafeteria and library (in combination with loans and scholarships), and knew I’d have to have a job lined up the moment I graduated.

It was startling to learn that this new retirement gig is nothing like my prior life — the high heels replaced with sneakers; the suits and dresses with yoga pants and T-shirts; the corporate gym with walking on my road trying to avoid the local pit bull and the poison ivy; restaurant dining with takeout pizza; and subways, buses and taxis with my own Subaru (my very first car).

Accustomed to an intense working day, I initially busied myself going through closets and cleaning the basement, meeting friends for lunch (I’d not taken a real lunch break in over 40 years), sleeping late ( I’d spent decades setting my alarm for 5:30 a.m. to go to the gym before work); and getting my first dog and suddenly becoming a “ dog person” (growing up in apartment houses, my pets were turtles and parakeets and goldfish, and then cats once I lived in NYC). Somehow I managed to fill my day, and then late last spring I left NYC for good, and that just drove home how much my life was changing .

So here I am trying to figure out what next, and I struggle. I love sleeping in, but feel guilty. I enjoy having friends for brunch and dinner, but miss dining out. It’s so much more efficient doing my own nails — now quite short — but I miss treating myself to manicures. I love the quiet on my road, but I miss the energy of the City. Then there are all the new things I worry about, like black ice on the road or running out of gas, CVS not having one of my many new medications, or running out of Oatmilk, the house being a mess when someone drops in unexpectedly, new aches and pains I can’t figure out, slipping on the ice, the deer eating my flowers, the dog eating the meat we took out for dinner, and so much more. These may sound like silly problems, and I am keenly aware that we live in a world and at a time when so many are suffering with very serious challenges, but for the purposes of this column, I hope to address the many issues that confront so many of us who, in one way or another, are just trying to acclimate to this new chapter in our life. I have actually compiled a list of 50 possible topics, but I expect many more will come to mind as I start to write.

Please feel free to reach out to me with your thoughts or questions at Gweng@millertonnews.com

Gwen Greene is retired and lives in Pine Plains with her partner Dennis, her puppy Charlie, and 2 Angus cows, also retired.

Latest News

Feedback sought at public forum as part of a five-year improvement plan for County’s Family Services

Sabrina Jaar Marzouka led the Oct. 2 Department of Community and Family Services Forum.

Krista Briggs

POUGHKEEPSIE — On the evening of Wednesday, Oct. 2, the Dutchess County Department of Community and Family Services (DCFS) held an open forum at the Department of Mental Health to discuss a five-year Child and Family Services (CFS) Plan.

Fiscal and staffing challenges aside, the focus of DCFS remains on refining the five-year plan, meeting its targets and serving the county’s most vulnerable residents, many of whom depend on these supports simply to survive.

Keep ReadingShow less
Finding my footing: adventures in a new home
Scenes from a day of exploration and hydration in the Northwest Corner.
Alec Linden

On a cloudy Wednesday at the start of October, my girlfriend, Taylor, and I decided to enjoy the autumn afternoon by getting off our laptops and into the woods for some much needed movement. Having just moved to Norfolk as a new reporter for the Lakeville Journal, I was on the hunt for panoramic views of the landscape I now call home, accessible with the hour and a half of daylight left to us. Haystack Tower it was.

I’m not entirely unfamiliar with the landscapes of the Northwest Corner: I visited family and friends in the region as a child and would drive up on high school joyrides from my home in Westchester County. But calling somewhere home brings new meaning to a place, and I was eager to see a familiar view with a new sense of belonging.

Keep ReadingShow less
Kent unveils juried art show
Leila Hawken

Chilly rain sprinkles did not keep area art lovers away from the opening of the Kent Art Association’s Fall Juried Art Show on Sunday, Oct. 13. Judges for the event were association members Liz Maynard and Conrad Levenson. The show will continue until Saturday, Nov. 2, during the association's open hours.

Kent artist and long-term resident Carolyn Millstein (above) paused for a photo next to her piece, “Near Oakdale."

SHELTER show opens at Royal Arcanum Building in Norfolk
Natalia Zukerman

“SHELTER,” an art exhibit supporting The Gathering Place opened on Suday, Oct. 12, at the Royal Arcanum Building in Norfolk, Conn. Featuring works by fourteen area artists, proceeds from sales will benefit The Gathering Place based in Torrington, Conn., which provides essential services to the homeless across 26 towns in Litchfield County. Open weekdays, this vital resource offers everything from hot showers and laundry facilities to housing assistance. The exhibit runs through Nov. 24.