Participants at annual conference encouraged to ThinkDifferently by respecting evolving etiquette norms

HYDE PARK, N.Y. — On Thursday, Dec. 5, the annual ThinkDifferently conference was held at the Henry A. Wallace Visitor and Educational Center in Hyde Park, New York. The conference strived to enlighten participants on evolving protocols for addressing and collaborating with individuals with challenges.

Hosted by Dana Hopkins, program director of All Abilities at the Department of Behavioral and Community Health, ThinkDifferently is an initiative first launched in 2015 by former county executive Marc Molinaro with a goal to provide services to individuals with varying abilities and guidance for others such as businesses and communities to help create a more inclusive society.

The conference, which is in its eighth year, has evolved throughout its existence. Hopkins said while the one consistent has been its daily duration, the presentation and subject matter has varied. “Each year has been a full-day conference which has included discussions with authors, clinical professionals, et cetera. Previous conferences included a ‘services across the lifespan’ session, which covered birth to death,” she said. “We adjusted our format based on feedback from attendees as the services through the lifespan [session] was often redundant.”

This year’s conference was broken into a morning session which included opening remarks from county executive Sue Serino to welcome participants and show her support for the initiative followed by personal experiences from panelists and preferred protocols while interacting with individuals with challenges. The afternoon session featured speaker Emma Arnoff, a licensed social worker, who further elaborated on protocols, the subject of neurodiversity which is described as varying manners of how the brain works, and ableism which is defined as discriminatory practices and prejudicial attitudes towards individuals with challenges. The audience consisted primarily of educators, social services workers, and providers to individuals with varying abilities.

According to Hopkins, ThinkDifferently has less to do with individuals and is more supports-oriented. “ThinkDifferently is not direct programming for people with disabilities and/or their families,” she said. “Rather, a key component of the work we do is helping individuals and families navigate the often-complicated network of providers, as well as resources available at various levels of government. We also create and host inclusive events throughout the year, but most services and programs are contracted out to our local nonprofit agencies.”

Respectful speech and courteous behavior as well as consideration for personal preferences were amongst the themes for this year’s conference. According to both Hopkins and Arnoff, while there are no set rules of etiquette, and the vernacular is constantly evolving, it’s important to consider the individual and their desires. As Hopkins explained, the vernacular can vary between person-first and identity-first language, a more recent trend which began only a few years ago.

“Disability etiquette is individually based and constantly changing,” she said. “When we are speaking about people who have disabilities (and we do not know their preferences) we use person-first language (meaning we say ‘person with a disability’ versus ‘disabled person’ which is identity-first language). Only in instances when someone has specifically told us they prefer identity-first language do we utilize that. For individuals with mobility devices or other aides (canes for those that are blind or have low vision), never touch their devices or aides, unless they ask you to, and/or if you ask and they say yes. Think of the devices and aides as extensions of their bodies.”

While sensitivity towards others is always appropriate, terminology is fluid. Words and phrases which were once socially acceptable such as ‘special needs’, ‘handicapped’, ‘impairment’ and ‘differently abled’ are now to be avoided, which is proper and correct. “Language always is and should be evolving,” Arnoff said. “This move to first-person language comes from neurodivergent people finding pride in who they are and not seeing themselves as deficient. As the language evolves, it is our job to learn and listen.” Hopkins agreed, saying, “Some of these phrases/words are euphemisms to make those without disabilities feel better when talking about disabilities, but they aren’t helpful to people with disabilities.”

While attitudes and language has trended more toward sensitivity toward individuals with varying abilities, both Arnoff and Hopkins emphasized the importance of two-way communication, and also, of being mindful of lessons from previous years. “People with disabilities are just that: people,” Hopkins said. “To find out more about what is appropriate and what isn’t, talk with the disability community.”

Arnoff, too, reinforced the need for understanding and awareness, saying, “It’s important that we don’t beat ourselves up for what we did in the past and rather learn from it to be different in the future. It is critical we do this by listening ... It is not our job to change or fix [them] but rather to learn about what makes them who they are, so we can see what makes them amazing.”

The conference is only one event on ThinkDifferently’s very active calendar. Upcoming happenings include a sensory-sensitive performance of “The Nutcracker” on Friday, Dec. 13, the Dance Forever/Rhythm Works hip-hop dance program for young people of varying abilities on Saturday mornings, twice-monthly workshops on applying for social security disability programs and a retreat in mid-January for neurodiverse young adults. For more information, visit www.thinkdifferently.net.