AMENIA — Friends, family and colleagues of Amenia resident Paula Pelosi filled Smithfield Church to capacity on Saturday, Aug. 1, to celebrate a life marked by generosity, creativity and compassion.
Through music and heartfelt remembrances from close friends representing the many chapters of her life, the memorial service painted a portrait of Pelosi’s deep ties to the contemporary art world, her unwavering kindness and her love for both people and animals.
Pelosi died in April at the age of 76 following a brief battle with pancreatic cancer.
Although she was best known professionally for organizing exhibitions of the work of renowned contemporary artist Frank Stella, Pelosi found equal fulfillment in the rural life of Amenia. She lived on Separate Road in the Smithfield hamlet, just a short walk from Smithfield Church.
Community service was an important aspect of Pelosi’s life as she served 10 years as a member of the Amenia Zoning Board of Appeals.
A recurring theme throughout the memorial service was that of lifelong friendships, each speaker reflecting on a significant period of life experiences shared with Pelosi.
“She was unique and fabulous,” said the Rev. Douglas Grandgeorge of The Smithfield Church. “She made you feel liked right away,” he said, highlighting her unwavering spirit of generosity. “She contributed to every single thing we did.”
Noting that her death came too rapidly, he said that too few were able to say farewell, but he observed that months after her death, she could fill a church.
“Your presence here is a blessing,” Grandgeorge said, welcoming those gathered.
Friends from every stage of Pelosi’s life attended, including members of the art world, childhood friends from Ohio, classmates from West Virginia and friends from her decades in New York City. Amenia officials who served alongside Pelosi on town boards were also present.
Friend Hope Cohn continued the tributes, reading a letter provided by Pelosi’s lifelong friend Carol Ann Kucharski, who had been unable to attend in person.
The Hon. Norah McCann King, Magistrate Judge for the Southern District of Ohio, recalled knowing Pelosi’s parents in Ohio, and said that she and Pelosi became friends during their West Virginia high school years. Pelosi’s plans at that time had been to pursue a career in law, she said.
“She wanted to change the world and she wanted to make it a better world,” Judge McCann said.
Lifelong friend Leslie Hannafey spoke next, picking up Pelosi’s life story from their meeting in 1967 during college years in New York City.
“She believed in doing the right thing,” Hannafey said, echoing the recurring theme of lifelong friendship and generosity.
“Do the right thing. Try to help your neighbors,” Hannafey said, which defined Pelosi’s actions in innumerable instances.
“She was always doing something for others,” said Nan Cassidy, recalling her friendship that began in 1980 in Amenia and highlighted Pelosi’s connectedness with animals.
Cassidy spoke of her dog.
“He was very naughty,” Cassidy said of Pelosi’s wire-haired dachshund, Dizzy, who tended to bite lots of people, including Pelosi. Cassidy said that she frequently accompanied Pelosi to the emergency room at Sharon Hospital, so often that they became known there. So known, in fact, that emergency personnel suggested that they might refer Dizzy to animal control.
Peter Stella shared memories of Pelosi’s years working with his father, artist Frank Stella, recalling stories from their time together in Amenia and on the family’s farm.
Music was provided by organist Simone Ehmann at the start of the service.
The memorial concluded with an original song, “From Afar,” written and performed by Nashville country artist Jack Schneider in tribute to Pelosi. Schneider said Pelosi’s generosity and encouragement helped sustain him during his years as a music student at New York University, when he frequently visited her in Amenia. He has since built a career as a recording artist and country music performer.
“Wherever you go, wherever you are, I’ll be loving you from afar,” Schneider sang.
Meg Sher, executive director of the David M. Hunt Library in Falls Village.L. Tomaino 
