Weeding Out the Walk-In
Who knows what treasures lurk in the back of your closet? Perhaps a pledge paddle and a giant egg cup …
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Steven Willand, Jr.
Oct 01, 2025
LAKEVILLE, Conn. — Steven Willand, Jr., 97, of Newton, died Saturday, Sept. 20, 2025, at the United Methodist Communities at Bristol Glen in Newton.
Steven was born in Montclair and lived most of his childhood years in Fairfield. He graduated from Grover Cleveland High School in Caldwell, then proudly served in the United States Army during the Korean Conflict. He was the former owner and operator of Steven Willand, Inc. in Augusta until his retirement in 1994. Steven was a longtime Sussex County resident, spending many years in Frankford Township and Lafayette.
Steven was a lifetime member of the VFW. He found peace outdoors, enjoying bass fishing, fly fishing in Montana, and hunting in his younger years. One of his true joys in life was living on the lake in Connecticut before returning to New Jersey. He had a love of country music and enjoyed the simplicities of tending to his vegetable garden.
Steven was predeceased by his parents, Stephen Willand, Sr. and Mae (Paige) Willand; his first wife, SophieAnn Willand; and his second wife, Ruthmary Willand. He is survived by his children, Scott Willand and wife, Synda, and Suzanne Willand; his stepchildren, James, Mary and Richard Pellegrino; and his grandchildren, Sharyce, Statler, and Steffen.
Arrangements are private under the direction of Smith-McCracken Funeral Home. Steven will be laid to rest in Frankford Plains Cemetery.
In lieu of flowers memorial donations can be made in Steven’s memory to St. Jude Children’s Research Hospital, 501 St. Jude Pl, Memphis, TN 38105 or to Father John’s Animal House, 50 Father John’s Lane, Lafayette, NJ 07848.
Online condolences may be offered at www.smith
mccrackenfuneralhome.com.
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Carol Kastendieck
Oct 01, 2025
SALISBURY, Conn.- — Carol Kastendieck was born April 10, 1945 in Brooklyn, New York. She died on Sept. 19, 2025, in Salisbury, Connecticut. She was the eldest child and only daughter of Miles and Clementine Kastendieck, older sister to her brothers Jon and Richard, and beloved friend and mentor to countless others.
Carol graduated high school from Packard Institute in Brooklyn, earned her BA at Indiana University and her MA at Carnegie Mellon. She had initially trained in classical dance, performing with the Metropolitan Opera ballet. However, during college she discovered a passion for the theater and would go on to have a rich and engaging career as a director for theater, opera and musical theater.
She directed and choreographed over 150 productions nationally, despite the challenges of being a woman in a profession dominated by men. Notably, she collaborated with her mentor, director John Houseman, and directed Rock Hudson in “John Brown’s Body” in Los Angeles.
Carol’s preferred playwright was Shakespeare and she was known to quote much of his work from memory. Toward the end of her career, Carol focused on teaching and mentoring young actors, directors and filmmakers. She taught at Juilliard, Hofstra, Carnegie Mellon, the Riverside Shakespeare Company School, the American Academy of Dramatic Arts, and SUNY Purchase.
She ultimately retired from teaching to care for her aging parents, for whom she always expressed the deepest gratitude and with whom she remained until their final days.
She did not have children and never married, but had meaningful and life-long relationships with the friends and students she considered her adopted family. She was a faithful and beloved member of her community.
The Kastendieck summer residence was called The Mill, a historic 1744 grist mill they had renovated as a family when Carol was a child. After her mother’s death, she made Salisbury her home. She retained fond memories and a lasting connection with the place and people there.
Carol loved gardening, following in her mother’s footsteps, and drew inspiration from her gardener friends and the many adventures and conversations they shared. She devoted a great deal of time and care to her own garden. She considered it her greatest creative opus and experienced it as a living ecosystem of sentient beings.
Her creativity also manifested itself in whimsical sculptures and dramatic flower arrangements. She was a fan of tag sales and always wore delightful accessories and gave unusual gifts. She loved going to the theater or to the movies with friends, especially leading up to the Oscars. She also enjoyed throwing intimate dinner parties and having friends over for tea.
Carol was a breast cancer survivor and faced increasingly challenging health issues, but rarely allowed these to impede her vision. In recent years, she made a practice of sending daily poems and inspirational messages.
Those who knew Carol Kastendieck describe her as a force of nature, with strong opinions and passionate devotion to environmental causes. She loved life and had an adventurous and joyful spirit. She was equal parts curiosity and determination, courage and delight.
She is survived by her brother Jon, her nieces and nephews and grand nieces and nephews, her family of friends, and her beloved cat.
Memorial Service details pending.
The Guest House
by Jalal al-Din Rumi
This being human is a guest house. Every morning a new arrival.
A joy, a depression, a meanness, some momentary awareness comes as an unexpected visitor.
Welcome and entertain them all! Even if they’re a crowd of sorrows, who violently sweep your house empty of its furniture, still, treat each guest honorably. He may be clearing you out for some new delight.
The dark thought, the shame, the malice, meet them at the door laughing, and invite them in.
Be grateful for whoever comes, because each has been sent as a guide from beyond.
Taken from SELECTED POEMS by Rumi, Translated by Coleman Barks (Penguin Classics, 2004).
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James van Benschoten Dresser
Oct 01, 2025
SALISBURY, Conn. — On Sept. 22, 2025, James van Benschoten Dresser passed away peacefully at his home in Salisbury. He was 83.
Born in New York City, to Elizabeth Jenks Dresser and James van Benschoten Dresser, Jim spent his youth in Bermuda and moved with his mother to Salisbury upon his parent’s divorce. He earned a scholarship to Salisbury School that Jim considered transformative, giving him the brotherhood and direction he needed to flourish. This resulted in a passion for education and a commitment to make things better for those less fortunate that would blossom into action in his later years.
Jim followed a lengthy family tradition to attend Wesleyan University where his interests broadened to include the state of the union and those who could improve it. His dedication to Wesleyan and its sports never wavered and as Chairman of the Board, he raised substantial funds in support of both. After college, Jim spent a stint in Air Force Intelligence in southeast Asia. He picked up a correspondence law degree (ever the learner), met his first wife, Patricia Van Allman, later moving with her to Boston and joyfully adding their son, Clay, to the family unit. He attended Harvard Business School and the Fletcher School of Law and Diplomacy. Upon graduation, he joined the fledgling Boston Consulting Group (BCG) where he helped to make it grow into the multi-national powerhouse it is today. He married a second time to Evan Crosby and retired early from his role as Chief Administrative Officer to commit more fully to family and personal interests.
In retirement, Jim moved back to Salisbury and was elected selectman which put him in a special position to benefit heartfelt causes such as housing and education. He had a firm belief that people such as nurses, teachers, plumbers, ambulance and fire volunteers etc. who provided valuable services to the community should be able to live in the community. Thus began his quest to help with affordable housing to make that possible. As a member of the Salisbury Housing Committee (for rentals), he joined forces with motivated, forward thinking, creative minds to move the onerous process forward. He donated property and raised significant funds to build more affordable housing. Jim also served on several boards that supported education and other needs of the community. He was never a passive participant – he threw body and soul into every committee he served on.
Happily, Laura Carlson met Jim through their affiliation with the Salisbury Association. At the time, they were both at loose ends and after 5 years of dating, they married. They enjoyed a rich, loving life together for 18 years - too short a time.
Jim is survived by his wife, Laura, his son, Clay Dreslough (Dee), granddaughter, Ellie, his brother, Scott Dresser (Bonnie), and his sister, Marguerite Dresser (Michael Kluchman), niece and nephew, Elizabeth and Henry Dresser-Kluchman.
In lieu of flowers, contributions can be made to the Salisbury Housing Committee, PO Box 10, Salisbury, CT 06068. Jim will be smiling.
A celebration of Jim’s life will take place in July 2026, at his favorite place on earth, Mt. Riga and with a community he grew up with and loved. Details will be published in The Lakeville Journal as the time draws near.
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Russell James Riva, Jr.
Oct 01, 2025
CANAAN, Conn. — Russell James “Teter” Riva, Jr, 94, of 7 Beau Ridge passed away Thursday morning Sept. 25, 2025, at his home surrounded by his loving family. He was the husband of Caryl (Pennekamp) Riva. Teter and Caryl were married on April 11, 1953 and celebrated 72 years of marriage this year. In addition to his wife, Teter is survived by his son Russell P. “Rusty” Riva, his daughter Suzanne “Suzy” Riva, both of Canaan. His nephew Louis “Buddy” Riva and his wife Pam of Canaan, Cagney Riva of Sheffield, Massachusetts and Cody Riva of Canaan. Teter was predeceased by his brothers Louis “Sonny” Riva and LeRoy Riva, sister Cynthia Riva, and grandson Tate Riva.
Teter was born in the former Geer Hospital in Canaan on Sept. 17, 193, the son of the late Russel James “Red” and Edith (Massini) Riva Sr. After graduating from Housatonic Vally Regional High School, Teter earned his Bachelor’s Degree in Architectural Engineering from the Chicago Technical College. He was drafted into the US Army and served during the Korean War with the Army Corps of Engineers.
After serving in the Army, Teter and Caryl returned to Canaan where he worked as Forman in his parents store and eventually becoming President of C. A. Lindell & Son Inc. which included the hardware store, lumber yard, fuel oil, and John Deere equipment. Teter’s hard work, vision and foresight built a new hardware store, one of the first and largest drive through lumber yards on the east coast, expanded Lindell Fuels, Inc by building a complex tank farm with fleet dispensers, one of the first of its magnitude in New England, a full-service 24/7 HVAC and propane provider, and started an equipment rental company.
Teter took after his father, who started out as a carpenter, and built the Canaan Post Office and several homes for family and friends while running Lindell’s. Never one to remain still, Teter started his own construction company, North Canaan Builders, Inc. and partnered with Chris Carr to form Carr Riva Developers. Working with US Department of Housing & Urban Development in Washington, DC and Connecticut Housing Finance Authority they developed, built and managed apartment complexes in Canaan, Middletown, Windsor, Plainville, and Meriden Connecticut and Longmeadow Massachusetts.
Teter thought of community as family and was always willing to lend a helping hand to anyone along the way. Among his many accomplishments he served as a Scoutmaster of Troop 22, Rail Road Historical Association, Board of Directors of Visiting Nurse & Hospice of Litchfield County in Bantam, Chairman of the Board at Geer Village Nursing and Rehabilitation Center for 45 years, and Board of Directors of the National Iron Bank for 48 years.
Teter loved fishing with his family on Twin Lakes, Square Dancing and Round Dancing with Caryl in Connecticut and Florida. He was an avid golfer and a member at the Wyantenuck Country Club in Great Barrington, Massachusetts for 48 years as well as Plantation Golf and Country Club for 42 years in Venice, Florida.
Funeral services will be held at the convenience of the family. A celebration of Teter’s life will be held at the Couch Pipa Post 104 South Canaan Road Canaan, CT 06018 on Thursday October 2, 2025 at 1:00 pm. There are no calling hours. Memorial donations may be sent in Teter’s memory to the North Canaan Volunteer Ambulance Corps PO Box 178 15 North Main St. Canaan, CT 06018. Arrangements are under the care of the Newkirk-Palmer Funeral Home 118 Main St. Canaan, CT 06018.
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