Millerton mourns the loss of one of its matriarchs, Marian Smith

MILLERTON — A person with a willingness to help those in need is indeed a treasure, but to find someone who has a genuine investment in their community and goes the extra mile to connect with friends, loved ones and strangers alike is a rarity. Marian (Shea) Smith, a longtime Millerton resident and owner of the former Thriftique, was known in the community for doing all of the above, and residents were saddened to learn of her passing on Tuesday, Dec. 15. Smith was in her 90s when she died.

Born in Brooklyn, Smith took up residence in Dumont, N.J., Sidney Center and Rockville Centre, N.Y., among other places, before she landed in Millerton. A 1944 graduate of South Side High School in Rockville Centre,  she married Stanley Smith in June of 1945, and the couple’s first years of marriage took them to Millerton, Long Beach and Levittown, N.Y., before they returned to Millerton in the 1960s and set up a home for their family on Mill Road. 

In the 65 years that Smith resided in the area, she was heavily involved, whether she was writing the weekly “Cracker Barrel Chatter” column for The Millerton News, attending church at Immaculate Conception Church in Amenia or participating in the Foreign Student Exchange Program at Webutuck High School. 

Having been among those involved in the 1972 founding of the North East Historical Society, Smith previously served as both president and on its Board of Directors. 

Smith was a recipient of the Millerton Lions Club’s Citizen of the Year award in 2007 and was presented with an Outstanding Achievement Award from the North East Historical Society in 2014 for her role as a “champion of local history.”

“Like many before her who became important members of our community, Marian Shea Smith was not born here,” said Ed Downey, president of the North East Historical Society. “She came here as a young bride who over time made lasting friendships, helped raise a family and made important contributions to our community. She believed one should be involved in one’s community and her sense of civic engagement has made Millerton a better place. She has left us all an invaluable legacy: The gift of good example.”

Indeed, Smith’s generosity, kindness and interest in the community was a source of inspiration to local residents as well as to her family, many of whom have since become involved in civic life. Her late husband once served as president of the North East Historical Society and had worked as the village building inspector. Smith’s late daughter, Mariley (Smith) Najdek, once served as a village trustee and later as mayor of Millerton; she helped establish the North East Fire District and was a founding member of both the North East Community Center (NECC) and the Adopt-a-Family program. Smith’s granddaughter, Jennifer Najdek, served for years as Millerton’s recreation director and is now a village trustee. Donald Najdek, Jennifer’s brother and another of Smith’s grandchildren, served on the village’s Recreation Commission for five years. Public service runs in their blood, it seems.

Smith also gave back to the community by opening the consignment store, Thriftique. Donald explained that Thriftique began when Smith went to visit his mother, Mariley, who was then center director at the Astor Head Start-Millerton Day Care. As people used to donate clothes to the center, Najdek said his mother was often overwhelmed by the number of donations. 

His grandmother suggested a consignment shop could streamline the process and then donate the proceeds. Thus Thriftique was born, operating first on South Center Street (where the NECC playground is now) and then at 22 Main St., where the T-Shirt Farm now stands. 

Admiring the tremendous work his grandmother did, Donald noted that Smith ran Thriftique on top of working as a full-time healthcare aide at Noble Horizons at Salisbury, Conn.

“I have always admired my mom’s strength and independence,” said Smith’s son, Michael Smith, of Millerton. “She surrounded herself with friends and family and even considered those who didn’t have family nearby as part of hers.”

His son, Dustin Smith, of Seattle, Wash., agreed.

“She did a lot for all of us and the community,” he said “She always treated new people as if they could be potential family and I think she got a lot of that through Thriftique. She talked to anyone who came in there and built really strong relationships.”

After talking with Smith’s loved ones, many of her family members spoke with deep appreciation about her wit, her passion for art, her love of cooking and hosting parties and her social calendar teeming with tea and lunch dates with friends and family members. As a grandmother, Smith idolized her grandchildren, said daughter-in-law Cindy Dietter-Smith, adding she was known on their college campuses as the “Cookie Grandma” for the batches of cookies she baked and sent their way.

Donald Najdek recalled a story about fishing up and down the stream of the Ten Mile River before he eventually ended up on Mill Road, where Smith would make him lunch. Dustin Smith talked about the shoeboxes he kept over the years containing letters from his grandmother.

“It’s one of the best memories I have of her, is how much effort she put into connecting with all of us,” he said, “and it’s really nice when someone tries to put that effort in and get to know who you are.”

“I’ve been fortunate to have two strong female role models in my life — my mother and my grandmother,” Jennifer Najdek said.

Considering the lessons her grandmother passed on to her, Najdek said she was taught to always listen without judgment. 

“She never really gave advice and I think that’s the best lesson I could take away from her,” she said. “It really wasn’t so much [giving] advice as to always be there to listen.”